THESE ARE ACTUAL NEWSPAPER ADS! 



FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 years old. Hateful little dog. Bites 



FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog. 



FREE PUPPIES... Part German Shepherd, part stupid dog 



FREE GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. Neutered. Speaks German. 



FOUND DIRTY WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat... been out a while... better be 

a reward. 



COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.. Also 1 gay bull for sale. 



NORDIC TRACK $300 Hardly used... call Chubby 



GEORGIA PEACHES, California grown - 89 cents lb. 



JOINING NUDIST COLONY! Must sell washer and dryer $300 



WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE. WORN ONCE BY MISTAKE. Call Stephanie. 



(AND THE BEST ONE) 



FOR SALE BY OWNER: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. 

Excellent condition. $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, got married 

last month. Wife knows everything.